Parabola Magazine • Photograph by Fan Ho, “Approaching Shadow,” 1954 ...

Photograph by Fan Ho, “Approaching Shadow,” 1954

Be Kind To Oneself

I try to set a time each evening to sit quietly for five or ten minutes and try to be aware of this body. I don’t need to do anything except observe what is taking place. I see that I give in to my resistances all too easily. Before I approach my meditation, I can say to my body that, “if you allow me to do this, I will let you surf the internet for an hour as a reward.” This inner bargaining can be extremely useful. And above all else, I try to remember to be kind with myself, especially the parts that remain interested in this effort. There’s an old native story that illustrates out human predicament beautifully. It goes like this:

The grandfather looked at his young granddaughter thoughtfully. Something in the beloved child of his child was developing there and so he spoke to her as follows:

“Inside me, there are two wolves and these two wolves fight each other constantly. One of the wolves is aggressive, nervous and filled with a wish to succeed. The other wolf is different. He wishes for more understanding. Both wolves want fulfillment. The first wolf dreams that this could result in more prestige in the eyes of others but the other wolf believes that fulfillment may be found through the path of understanding.”

The grandfather observed that his granddaughter was looking at him anxiously and added “Don’t worry about me alone, for this fight between the two wolves takes place in every one of us existing on this earth. In other people, the first wolf may have a variety of characteristics but the second wolf is, more or less, the same in everyone.”

The granddaughter looked thoughtful and was silent for some time and then she said, “Grandfather, which wolf will win the fight in you?” “Well” said her grandfather, “It depends which one I feed.”

—Luke Storms

from PARABOLA Newsletter: September 3rd, 2010. Click here to subscribe.